Tuesday, November 09, 2004

a post.

So last night, my friend Mattie reached into my sleep-induced coma with three simple text messages and pulls me out for an emergency hug on the middle of LowerBourke. I run outside into the freezing cold in a sweatshirt and capri pajama pants to meet a very distraught Mattie. I hug him tightly and he starts to cry. What do I do now? I do what I normally do...stroke the head, shh..., squeeze tighter. What else is there to do? The story unfolds--his asshole of a Dad, his grandpa that was just taken off of life support, and Matt, caught somewhere in the middle of Las Vegas and Kansas City. All I can do is hug him and be there for him.

And you know...

...sometimes that is just the thing that we need. We don't want somebody to ask questions or accuse us...just be there and support me no matter what I am going through. Whether you think I am at the right stage is insignificant. Just be there with me.

I come back to crawl back into my warm bed when I am stopped short by my friend Katie. It was obvious that she had been crying and so I mentally started preparing myself for another battle of being. Her friend's fiancee from her old school (transfer) was just killed today in Iraq. Katie is confused and pissed and well, yeah. He was on his way from his regular safehouse to a new one and ran over a bomb. The chaplain called her friend (his parents aren't in the picture) and told her that if there were any remains, they would be sent home.

WHAT THE FUCK!?!

I can NOT EVEN IMAGINE what that would be like. Planning a life together, having BOUGHT A HOUSE together, telling everyone that he was okay because he was at a safehouse, getting married when he gets back in TWO MONTHS. And then, going about your normal daily business and recieving a call that he is gone. The love of your life. She will always wonder what could have been. What it would have been like.

And I worry about my little test. Wow...

2 Comments:

At 8:44 PM, Blogger _1_ said...

I love you, honey, and I sympothize for you friends. I wish I could hug you right now!

 
At 8:58 PM, Blogger liu said...

life will always give everyone a blow in the back when one least expects it...
we can not count on the momentary safety and security that we feel right now coz they are always fleeting...
and happiness is always a dream...
life is a bitch...
it's a good thing you were there when your friends need you the most...
a steadfast friend is always a good thing to have...
you are the present your friends give to themselves....
mabuhay!

 

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